StoryTime!

Dear Reader,

I realize that there have been many times when a story of any kind sort of starts to develop in my head, or is also developed by other people. They're sometimes funny, thrilling, sad, or just random. So, instead of keeping all those adventures to myself or to selected people, I guess I should share those short stories or 'anecdotes' with the public.

Here's the first of'em! :

NOTE : The following story was created by both me and Sharrif Belwael. It was created from a series of Short Message Service messages, and will be presented as such. Some minor alterations have been made to make it easier to understand, without changing the story. Also note that this story was created out of spontaneity, and one person didn't know what the other person would add to the story, so there may be plotholes.


ATTACK OF THE POTATOES

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
"Potatoes are evil. Evil I tells'ya! They'll attack subtly, oh, of course. They know if they attack openly, they're doomed. Firstly, they'll sneak into restaurants' freezers and be cooked as french fries. Then, when eaten, they'll attack our brain and nervous system turning us into mindless zombies bent on world domination or destruction! Aaaaaaaah!!! It's too horrible to relive! I'm a survivor of the potatoes' attack on Mars. Save your people! Save your planet! Oh....." *dies*

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
"Don't die on us! Dang it! We just lost our best lieutenant! Get ready men! He just told us that the potatoes are on the move to take over! Battle stations!!!

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
"With all due respect sir, our battlecraft has been shot down, we've crashed in the middle of the jungle and have been living here for 3 weeks. That's probably why our lieutenant died. There's no food in this wretched place!"

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
"It's amazing you're still alive, private. Try to stay that way. Supplies are coming your way. Let's hope the aliens in that area don't pick us off one by one."

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
"Sir, it's just you and me now. And besides, we've been trying to contact home base for the 3 weeks we've been here but failed every time. What makes you think supplies are coming? And what're we gonna do if potatoes or aliens come?"

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
"We've still got weapons, private. I KNOW supplies are coming. Can't you see the supply ship there? In the sky, there. Ooh, the aliens just shot it down. Dang it!"

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
"Forget the supply ship! The aliens are chasing us! Ah!! I can hold them off for a while sir, I'm a master of mobile missile fire! You go on!"

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
"No private! Leave no man behind! You die, so do I! We live and die together! Now gimme the sonic shotgun. I'm gonna teach these aliens the meaning of PAIN!"

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
"We finished the ammo for that yesterday! You got too trigger happy with it! I'll give you the destructo-ray, I hear you're a 7th grade shot."

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
"Dang, I forgot. Well gimme the ray. I dunno where you got your intel from, but I'm a first gradeshot. They'll regret messing with us!"

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
"Oh shoot! I see the aliens and potatoes have collaborated. They're shooting potatoes!"

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
Okay, I'm watching a movie. Chat with you later.

Luqman (30 May 2008) :
Oh, sorry.

Sharrif (30 May 2008) :
The movie was over 50 minutes ago, BTW. Just wanted you to know that.

Luqman (31 May 2008) :
After fending off a squadron of the newly formed APAF (Alien and Potato Alliance Force), we find ourselves in the deep parts of the jungle where only the strange creatures live. In seek of shelter, we stumble upon an ancient village who lead the primitive lives their forefathers did. After speaking to the village leader, he has agreed to give food and shelter, but for only 3 days, should it be more, it would be unlucky.

On the way to your hut, you bumped into the village's leader's daughter. You both glance at each other and smile. You both apologize and then go to your own beds... Feeling hopeful.

Sharrif (31 May 2008) :
"Excuse me, private, she was looking at YOU. I remember nudging you. I was actually apologizing to YOU, since I was closer to her when she was interested in YOU."

Luqman (31 May 2008) :
"Oh c'mon, don't be so modest. She was looking at you. I have it recorded on tape. Sadly, the recording exploded as it was under the protection of YOUR heartbeat. Since you saw the girl, your heartbeat went crazy, and so did the recording. Tisk tisk...".

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
"People keep saying 'When pigs fly' when they're talking about something impossible. Pigs are smart. They don't deny this, because when we're not looking, they fly to the Bermuda Triangle, and take people hostage. That's what happened to Amelia Earhart, I tell ye! They're gonna kill us all!".

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
Oh no. Don't try starting something new. We're still fighting APAF and you and the village's leader's daughter are still sweethearts.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
I'm only starting something new because I don't want to be someone's sweetheart.

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
Alright fine.

Due to recent strange reports that claim homosapien transportation via hog levitation to the triangle of bermuda, we, the Elite Squad of Extraterrestrial Confrontation or ESEC were called to investigate. We have just listened to one of the hundreds of audio reports supporting this strange phenomenon. Me, special weapons and gear expert, and you, tactical specialist and decorated patriot were specifically chosen. We start our journey with HALO (High Altitude Low Oxygen, IINM) jumps to a remote island within the infamous three sided shape...

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
That jump went quite well. Now, do we enter the border via plane or boat? Or do we swim? I say boat, but we need to discuss this.

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
Boat.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
We get on the boat, and start our way. As soon as we cross the border, the island behind us is gone. Our boat is rocking wildly! Dang, we might capsize soon!

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
We do. Thankfully, we find a large yacht which uses a katamaran concept, thus is more stable. We climb aboard and find it completely empty, but the fuel tank still has half of its content. We sail against the great storm. It ends, and we rest for the night, too tired to continue.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
"Do you hear that? Get your weapons ready. I think we're finally going to know what causes these disappearances... Let's just hope it's just pigs, and nothing else..."

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
*KA-BOOM!*
L : Uh, sir?
S : What is it man?
L : It's not the just the pigs, and it's not only a few.
S : What?!
L : We've stumbled upon a warzone! The sound was a torpedo hitting a ship!
S : Where are the ships? The radar's busted!
L : I can't see'em, it's too dark, but I think the pigs are outnumbered.
S : Who are they fighting?
L : I don't know!
*KA-BOOM!*
L : Oh no! That one hit us!

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
"Fire them back! We'll team up with whatever DIDN'T shoot us! Go go go!".

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
L : Sir, this is a yacht, not a battleship!
S : Shut up and shoot!
L : These missiles only have a 500 yard limit! Not likely we'll hit something! And we're taking on water!
S : Shut up and shoot!!! I'll take care of the leak.
L : Alright!

I shoot into the darkness trying to get something. The first 4 shots were futile. 5th shot hit something.

*KA-BOOM!*

It sank. Suddenly, the loud sound of fire ceased. There was a long silence. Before we knew, the force attacking the pigs retreated.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
"Now, let's go and meet the pigs' leader. See if he, or it, knows anything. Hold that gun out properly. We don't know whether these pigs are hostile or not."

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
Uh, continue later, k?

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
We find ourselves surrounded by pig ships. They force us to meet their leader. After speaking, we have agreed to ally. You then accidentally bump into the leader's daughter. Boy is she ugly. You barf on her dress out of disgust. She runs away crying. The pig leader seems delighted. This confuses us, but is forgotten about.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
We have to continue this later. I'm a bit busy. Um, do we HAVE to have the leader's daughter in our roleplay thing?

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
It's fun.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
Fine. But next time, YOU be the leader's daughter's sweetheart.

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
You're not the sweetheart. You barfed on her.

Sharrif (1 June 2008) :
I know. But NEXT time, YOU be the sweetheart, because I was the sweetheart LAST time. It's only fair.

Luqman (1 June 2008) :
If so, then we'll end the story there, which I don't want to do. It's only fair.

Luqman (2 June 2008) :
Sorry if I woke you, but I just have to continue, I can't sleep. OK, the pig leader explains that he has been taking human hostages because he thought it were humans who were threatening his race. But after he saw us firing at the attacking force, he knew it weren't humans. He has apologised but will still keep the hostages until we help him defeat whatever we're fighting. To find out what it is, I take a look at the surviving damaged ships and inspect the torpedo holes. I'm shocked and quickly report to you my findings, and you too are shocked. The holes had signs of ecto-potato, meaning we're fighting APAF!

Sharrif (2 June 2008) :
Quote of the day : The opposite of love is not hate. It's indifference. If someone hates you, they still have feelings for you. If they really didn't care about you, they'd just forget about you. They wouldn't even waste time hating you.

Luqman (2 June 2008) :
Which is exactly how you feel about the pig's daughter. Lol.

[As of yet, the story titled "The Attack of the Potatoes" written by Sharrif Belwael and Luqman Belwael is still unfinished. Any further additions to this story will be updated.]


So, what do you think? So far, I mean? Rate-lah, out of 5, and make any critical comments if you will, like the no-good, two-bit, crackerbox, drunken-driven, hocus pocused critics you are! LOL.


That's all for now. Salams.