I have to admit, I tried to have a powerful effect of three U's for the title, but it didnt work.
It's 12:11 AM, I haven't finished my folios and it's the perfect time to blog!
Ok seriously, I just needed to update. It's been so long that it feels like I haven't fed a pet for awhile. Then again, I did have a pet fish which died out of starvation and living in dirty water. Say whatever, I'm extremely sorry for it.
"I'm sorry, Glooey."
Ah, it's nice to be back. Feels like a real long time since I've been here.
So, instead of making one long blog entry, trying to recap what the heck I've been doing over the last few weeks, I made a unified update. (hence, the title name. Duh!) What this means is that instead of me telling you what's happened, I'll let my past clones do that for me. How is this possible you might ask? Simple.
Over the weeks, I've been meaning to update but I just didn't finish the posts. They're still saved as drafts. So, I just copy, paste and voila! You have yourself a sloppy superb sassy sensational sandwich (post) waiting to be eaten, read and commented on.
[the following is the opinions and thoughts of the past Luqmans. The current Luqman now might not have similar opinions now. Should you be offended or concerned, sue them]
So let's start with the earliest one :
Date : 20 July 2008
Title : EMO
Dear Reader,
Oh... crap.
Help.
Help me.
I'm slowly being forcibly swallowed into this dEMOnic cult fueled by teenage angst.
I'm being dragged into a world of darkness
I'm fighting as hard as I can, clawing the ground, trying to hold on
This demon in a cloak is pulling my leg toward the darkness...
My attempts of freedom are in vain, and then...
My feet have touched the darkness!
It's growing on me
Growing, growing
It won't stop
It's taking over
It's taking over
IT"S TAKING OVER!
*clears throat*
Right. Back to reality.
All jokes aside, I really am feeling a change.
You're thinking,"What?! No way. Not you. Impossible."
But seriously? The thoughts are there. The EMOtional vulnerability is there.
WARNING : This part of my entry was shabbily put together, and might not make any sense to you. You'd just have to be me to really understand. Unless, you do, and me saying this is another sign showing that I'm growing up.
I realise I was more fun and random when I was younger, but now, I feel so different. I feel like I'm so, conventional, if you will. I can put everything into words. I don't use to think like that. I perceived before that there are some things, some things you could never explain. But now, I feel like I can. That--change--for me, has really, well, changed me.
I was looking at some stuff I typed out before, on some stuff I just wanted to talk about. I was more creative when I was younger.
And it's worse considering the fact that I have been trying so hard to sound like an intellectual, that I try to shut out a huge part of me. The whole "using bombastic words and giving well-thought opinions" was not true, and only in vain, for I did not grow any smarter. I not only am a fraud, but I am also losing a part of me that I treasure so much--my childishness. I'm losing both ways.
I didn't want to lose it. I knew I would, but I wanted it to last. I had foolishly aided in a cause which I didn't want to support.
Probably, I might have tried to evolve, because it is expected of me to do so.
Peer pressure? Because many friends have evolved, but I haven't?
Hunger for attention? To be thought of as an intellectual?
Maybe, maybe.
There. You've seen it. The awful truth.
Next :
Date : 7 August 2008
Title : The Ends
Currently listening to - Sadness and Sorrow by Toshiro Masuda (OST Naruto)
Dear Reader,
This song always gets to me.
You can feel the sorrow.
I remember watching Naruto episodes, when the dying character is badly wounded, bleeding, sufferring, but not crying for help. They've accepted their fate.
And, at some level, I guess I can understand them.
Why waste your last moments trying to live, when you could just go with as much as forgiveness and respect as you can?
I think I'm easily touched by this song, because it shows the end. In this case, it was life.
I hate endings, in general. Mainly because you don't have the privilege or luxury to enjoy something anymore. Be it life, childhood, friendship, marriage, occupation, having a home, having a family, or even the end of a movie. Anything that started out good, but is coming to an end, or has already come to an end, for me, really bums me out.
Heck, even yesterday, Thursday, I felt depressed. Reason? The last day of koko. Can you believe it? I guess it was because of not having anymore official scout meetings. Yeah, I used to not take it seriously, but after a real reshaping camp, I feel like it's a part of me already. Thanks to a scout named Sir Collin, and a few other Sirs, and one Miss.
To all scouts out there reading, I don't care. Do it now. Tepuk Pengakap!
Endings teach. Mostly, don't wait only until you're on your death bed to repent. Do it now. I assure you, you won't regret it. Just take the time to tell your mother, father, siblings, relatives, friends, neighbours, or just someone you care about that you love them, or apologize for the things that you think would need it.
Now this one is what I want to say now :
Date : 27 August 2008
Title : Facebook Fever Fear
Dear Reader,
Oh yeah, you know what I'm talking about.
Let me clarify for those who don't. You're on the computer to play a song while doing your work. Then you remember that you left an offline message to someone on GoogleTalk so you sign in to check if there's a reply. When you sign in, oh look!, there's a notification, you just got a new e-mail! You click on the link and read your e-mail. Oh wait, you remember you sent friend requests on FaceBook to a few people. You check if they've accepted.
Now it gets worse. Turns out they did, and out of curiosity (and pure stupidity) you click on their profile to read. Oh look! He beat your score on this application. Time to beat him. Oh crap.
Before you know it, it's 11 o'clock, your homework's still a mountain, your mother's telling you to sleep, and you still haven't beaten his score. OH GOD.
This is why I hate Facebook. Well, I don't hate it, but it's just, annoying when it wastes my time. I know it's my fault for even going on, but I can't help it if somebody has got a bigger brain than I do (Space Ace, but I bet you're a cyborg or alien) or have a bigger vocabulary than I do (salesman, 6000 over, in your face! book!).
The saying shouldn't be "procrastination is the thief of time". It should be "Facebook and procrastination work together to stop human activity and make people get bigger brains!" Argh! You must know how frustrating it is. Unless you're a non-addict, like Sharrif (Josh Carter).
Lucky.
Heck, Facebook was pretty much the reason why I haven't been blogging. And I guess I want to quit it. Well not completely of course, I have to defend my salesman title. But still, there will be a huge reduction of Facebooking for me.
You know why I'm doing this? I'm immitating President Kennedy.
What you're thinking: What the heck does President Kennedy have to do with a 14 year old quitting Facebook?
I'll tell you what.
In the years of the space race, President JFK made it crystal clear to the world that he wanted the US to be the first ones on the moon. He said it to the world. What he did was add social pressure into the mix, next to wanting to beat the Soviets. If America failed, then who would be blamed for it? He would. He would have the blame and the shame over the failed claim. That pretty much motivates a person.
I don't care about the whole controversy whether man did land on the moon in 1969 or not. What I'm saying is, I want to quit Facebook, I'm making it clear to you, and should I not succeed, let me have the blame and the shame over the failed claim.
Well, it's 1:05 AM now, it's late, and I should get going now. So just remember what I said.
That's all for now. Salams.
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